WISH YOU ALL A WONDERFUL NEW YEAR 2009

HI MY DEAR VALUABLE READER AND BLOG VISITORS,

"I WISH YOU ALL 'A WONDERFUL

NEW YEAR - 2009''
ALSO WISH YOU ALL TO ATTAIN

GREAT PROSPERTY UNTO YOUR LIFE.

"USE ALL YOUR EFFORTS TO ACHIVE
A NEW THING TO
THE NEW HEIGHTS
FROM THIS NEW YEAR"
-LOVE

LIFE ON WHEELS

One of my previous posts, i have posted a picture like this above called 'Life in Windows'. Now the similar kind of picture here above called 'The Wheels Of Life.' How nice life definition can be compressed in a simple format/picture like this.

BEE BITE

Incurably Fuuny Patient

please doctor help me. i have been stung by a bee.

Doctor - Dont worry . i will put some cream on it.

Patient - you will never find the bee. it must be miles away by now.

Doctor - No no please understand. i will put some cream on the place u were stung.

Patient -oh! it happened in the garden where i was sitting under a tree.

Doctor - u #$%& ! i mean in which part of the body did the bee sting.

Patient- it stung me on my finger.

Doctor - which one?

patient -how am i to know ? all the bees look the same to me

METRO MANNERS- IN JAPAN

THESE CARICATURES ARE NOT JUST FOR FUN.INFACT IT CARRY OUTS A GREAT TEACHING OF MANNERS IN THE METRO TRAINS OR IN THE PUBLIC.IT IS CAPTURED IN JAPAN.

LIFE IN WINDOWS

OUR LIFE IS WITHIN A FEW WINDOWS OR BEETWEEN MANY WINDOWS

FUN CARTOONS

I GOT THIS FUN CARTOONS FROM ANOTHER BLOG.

THE WEEK WORK CHART

THIS ABOVE IS THE WEEK WORK CHART FOR THE EMPLOYEES BY THEIR AGE WISE.

THEY ALL GO HAND IN HAND ON EVERY WEDNESDAY.YOU FIND OU WHY IT IS SO?

NOTHING MATTERS

ITS VERY CUTE AND THE MEANING IS SO...GREAT..

GIVING ADVERTISEMENT TO THE NEWS PAPER

Ad In The Paper

The local newspaper funeral notice telephone operator received a phone call.

A woman on the other end asked,

"How much do funeral notices cost?"

"$5.00 per word, Ma'am," came the response.

"Good, do you have a paper and pencil handy?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

"OK, write this: 'Fred dead.'"

"I'm sorry, Ma'am; I forgot to tell you there's a five-word minimum."

"Hmmph," came the reply, "You certainly did forget to tell me that.!!

-

-

" A moment of silence. "Got your pencil and paper?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

" OK, print this: 'Fred dead, Cadillac for sale.' "

LOVE LETTER WRITTEN BY HR-MANAGER

Check this out.

How a HR Manager could write a love letter to his girl friend?

To

Juliet

Sub: Offer of love!
Ref: Meeting in coffee shop


Dearest Ms Juliet,

I am pleased to inform you that I have fallen in Love with you since the 14th of October (Saturday).

With reference to the meeting held between us on the 13th of Oct. at 1500 hrs, would like to present myself as a prospective lover.

Our love affair would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on compatibility, would be made permanent. Of course, upon completion of probation, there will be continuous on the job training and performance appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse.

The expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us. Later, based on your performance, I might take up a larger share of the expenses. However I am broadminded enough to be taken care of, on your expense account.I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving this letter, failing which, this offer would be cancelled without further notice and I shall be considering someone else.

I would be happy, if you could forward this letter to your sister, if you do not wish to take up this offer.

Wish you all the best!

Thanking you in anticipation,

Yours sincerely,

HR Manager

ENGLISH -IT IS VERY CUTE

CUTE - ENGLISH ...

IS IT BIT CONFUSING YOU?

THESE THIRTEEN QUESTIONS WILL CONFUSE YOU.

1. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it FED UP ?

2. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

3. If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil comefrom?

4. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from

Holland called Holes?

5. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

6. Why the man who invests all your money called a broker?

7. If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?

8. Why is it called building when it is already built?

9. If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

10. If you're not supposed to drink and drive, then why do bars have parking lots?11. If you take an oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

12. If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Humans ?

13. If working hours are meant for working, then why are you reading this?

JOKES - COMPUTER VIRUSES

Types of computer viruses:-

Adam and Eve virus
Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.

Airline virus:
You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.

Anita Hill virus:
Lies dormant for ten years.

Arnold Schwarzenegger virus:
Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.

AT&T virus:
Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.

The MCI virus:
Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.

Bill Clinton virus:
This virus mutates from region to region and we're not exactly sure what it does.

Bill Clinton virus:
Promises to give equal time to all processes: 50% to poor, slow processes; 50% to middle-class processes, and 50% to rich ones. This virus protests your computer's involvement in other computer's affairs, even though it has been having one of its own for 12 years.

Congressional Virus:
Overdraws your computer.

Congressional Virus:
The computer locks up, screen splits erratically with a message appearing on each half blaming the other side for the problem.

Dan Quayle virus:
Prevents your system from spawning any child processes without joining into a binary network.

Dan Quayle virus:
Simplye addse ane ee toe everye worde youe typee.

David Duke virus:
Makes your screen go completely white.

Elvis virus:
Your computer gets fat, slow, and lazy and then self destructs, only to resurface at shopping malls and service stations across rural America.

Federal bureaucrat virus:
Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which do practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of the computer.

Freudian virus:
Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard.

Gallup virus:
Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin of error).

George Bush virus:
Doesn't do anything, but you can't get rid of it until November.

Government economist virus:
Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.

Jerry Brown virus:
Blanks your screen and begins flashing an 800 number.

Madonna virus:
If your computer gets this virus, lock up your dog!

Mario Cuomo virus:
It would be a great virus, but it refuses to run.

Michael Jackson virus: Hard to identify because it is constantly altering its appearance. This virus won't harm your PC, but it will trash your car.

New World Order virus:
probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.

Nike virus: Just Does It!

Ollie North virus:
Turns your printer into a document shredder.

Oprah Winfrey virus:
Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands back to 200MB.

Pat Buchanan virus:
Shifts all your output to the extreme right of your screen.

Paul Revere virus: This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending hard disk attack---once if by LAN, twice if by C:.

Paul Tsongas virus:
Pops up on December 25 and says, "I'm not Santa Claus."

PBS virus:
Your PC stops every few minutes to ask for money.

Politically correct virus:
Never calls itself a "virus", but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism".

Richard Nixon virus:
Also known as the "Tricky Dick Virus", you can wipe it out but it always makes a comeback.

Right To Life virus:
Won't allow you to delete a file, regardless of how old it is. If you attempt to erase a file, it requires you to first see a counselor about possible alternatives.

Ross Perot virus:
Activates every component in your system, just before the whole thing quits.

Ted Kennedy virus:
Crashes your computer but denies it ever happened.

Ted Turner virus:
Colorizes your monochrome monitor.

Terry Randle virus:
Prints "Oh no you don't" whenever you choose "Abort" from the "Abort, Retry, Fail" message.

Texas virus:
Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.

UK Parliament virus:
Splits the screen into two with a message in each half blaming other side for the state of the system.

Warren Commission virus:
Won't allow you to open your files for 75 years.

SOURCE:- from aha! jokes.THANKS TO AHA JOKES

SMILE.AS YOU PLEASE

SMILE,AS YOU PLEASE

Try SmilingWhen the weather suits you not,

Try smiling.When the coffee isn't hot,

Try smiling.

When your neighbours don't do right,

Or your relatives all fight,Sure 'tis hard,

but then you might Try smiling.

Doesn't change the things,

of course Just smiling.

But it cannot make them worseJust smiling

And it seems to help your case,

Brightens up a gloomy place,

Then, it sort of rests your face Just Keep Smiling

NEED OF COCKROACHES

Customer: "Do you have any cockroaches?

" Clerk: "Yes, we sell them to the fishermen."

"I would like 20,000 of them."

"What would you want with 20,000 cockroaches? "

"I'm moving tomorrow and my lease says , I must leave

my apartment in the condition in which I found it."

THE INNER RESOURCE MANAGEMENT

HI VIEWERS/READERS OF THIS BLOG,
VIST THIS BLOG. WHICH HAS SO MANY INTRESTING ARTICLES ,ESPECIALLY
FOR YOU SCHOOL GOING CHILDREN.
HERE IS THE LINK:-http://innerresourcemanagement.blogspot.com/

IT IS AN INVITATION TO EXPLORE AND EXPERIENCE THE RICH-RESOURCES AVAILABLE WITHIN YOU.
IT IS , JUST AN ART AND SCIENCE. IT IS A PURE BLOSSOMING OF YOUR OWN-SELF. BY USING ALL YOUR ENERGYS IN A SYNCHRONIZED PATTERN AND HITTING /ALLOW THE SEED TO GROW UNTO ITS ULTIMATE FLOWRING.

for the 'IRM ' workshops:- mail to us at- focustheuniverse@gmail.com

LOVELY WIFE'S

THE WIFE'S ARE OFTEN CALLED BETTER-HALF'S.

IT IS A TRUE STATEMENT.SEE THESE ABOVE PICTURE'S HOW DEVOTED THE WIFE'S ARE TO THEIR HUSBAND'S . MANY HUSBANDS ARE ALWAYS COMPLAIN ABOUT THEIR WIFE TAHT THEY ARE NOT LISTENING TO THEM AT ALL.

THE HUSBANDS(WHO FEELS SO) ARE ALL DOMINATED BY THEIR WIFE'S. THOSE HUSBANDS CAN HAVE A BETTER LOOK OF THIS ABOVE PHOTO'S, AND ATLEAST LET THESE TYPES HUSBAND'S DREAM ONCE BY IMAGINING

" THEIR WIFE'S ARE VERY SUPPORTIVE AND OBEDIENT " LIKE THIS ABOVE.

KADI JOKES

just for fun

MINDBLOWING: VIJAYAKANTH'S Dialogues in English

1) YOU can study and get any certificates. But You cannot get Your death certificate

2) YOU may have AIRTEL or BSNL connection but when u sneeze you will say HUTCH .

3 )YOU can bcome an engineer if you study in engineering college. you can not become a president if you studies in Presidency College.

4 ) YOU can expect a BUS from a BUS stop ... you cannot expect a FULL from FULL stop

5) A mechanical engineer can become a mechanic but a software engineer cannot become a software.

6 ) YOU can find tea in teacup. But cannot find world in world cup.

7)YO U can find keys in Keyboard but you can not find mother in motherboard.

How is it ? HA HA...

CARTOONS-JOKES

I HOPE YOU MAY NOT NEED THE HELP OF MY WORDS....

PLEASE HELP YOURSELF TO SMILE!!

FUNNY IMAGES FOR YOU

HI HOW DO YOU FEEL.AFTER SEEING THESE FUNNY IMAGES.LOOK REALLY AWESOME IS NOT IT?